http://youmakeherhappy.tumblr.com/

Parker, I don’t care if you see this because you now have found my Tumblr. I just don’t care anymore. As much as I love you, or thought that I loved you, it wasn’t good. It was not good. For either of us. I was tired of hurting. I’ve been hurting since November, and before that, since June, and before that since December. I guess what I’m saying is, was that I know that things had changed for the both of us in those three weeks off, and that’s why I was willing to give it, the third, and final shot. And it was worse than before. I. Was Tired. Of Hurting. I was tired of fighting all of the time, and not talking for days on end because we were both so pissed at the other. I was tired of my friends getting hurt, watching our relationship. I was tired of seeing you hurt even. I know that all each of us wanted was to be loved, and no that is not too much to ask. I’m sorry that it hurts, but no, I’m not sorry that I’ve once and for all come to the realization that you are not good for me as a boyfriend, and I am not good for you as a girlfriend. I may not know what I need in a guy as of right now, but I do know the things that I don’t need. And that would be the things that I went through with you for the past six months. I learned how to be happy without you. I just hope that you learn how to be happy without me. It may not seem like it, but I don’t like watching you hurt. I don’t like you telling me that I was all you had, the only one that hadn’t left. What you don’t get, was that you never really had me. Because I didn’t even have myself. Sometimes, within the past week, I’ve felt like I’ve been slipping again, and I don’t know what to blame. Most would say that it was us. I hate knowing that it probably was. I know how we are, I know that we won’t talk for a while. I know that. I think it’s stupid that you deleted your Facebook, and called Chelsea and went to the boatdock. I hate how you overreact. I hate it. I hate a lot of things, but I liked a lot too. But, it’s over Parker. I can’t fix us anymore. I can’t. And you can’t either. I’m still here if you ever need me, even if you’ve always been to stubborn to straight up ask for help. Oh well I guess. I can’t change you either. I’m sorry that we didn’t work. I hope that your Dad turns up. I hope that work doesn’t suck this summer. I hope you end up happy. That’s really all I can say. Other than in it’s own sick and twisted way, I think we loved each other.